On Saturday, June 8th, I’ll be signing copies of both Angel Eyes and Broken Wings in El Dorado Hills, California. My good friend and author, Jenny Lundquist, will also be there with her middle grade books, Seeing Cinderella and Plastic Polly.

Face In A Book is a fabulous little bookstore that provides a unique and intimate setting for chatting with readers. We’ll be taking questions, about our books and about the wild world world of publishing. If you’re a young adult or middle grade reader come on out. And if you’re not, come anyway! Let us convince you.

Saturday, June 8th

11am – 1pm

Face In A Book

4359 Town Center Blvd, Suite 113, El Dorado Hills, CA

Books will be available for purchase.

There and then gone.

In these rare moments, I FEEL like a writer. Like a published author. Like someone who has the enviable job of writing stories for a living. They’re wonderful, these moments. They bring with them a simple, pure, always fleeting feeling of confidence.

I can do this. I can write another story. I can BE this person.

I work hard to respect these moments. To honor them by sitting down in my office chair and dumping words onto a page. Because the truth of the matter is, these inspirited moments are fragile. They dissolve at the very hint of negativity, at the first wind of frustration, at the stink of words like trending and bestseller. It takes very little to scare my muse away. And without that confidence, without the itch of inspiration compelling me to write, it can be a fight to keep my head in the game.

I’m not alone in this, I know that. This isn’t even a problem unique to writers, but the truth is, these battles are fought in a place where you are of little help to me and I am of little help to you. Bloody battles are fought daily between my ears. In the noisy, crowded, aching place where my thoughts churn and churn with little relief. And when I’m losing, my very own mind flips those once sunny moments inside out and uses them against me.

We writers spend so much (too much?) time here. In our own heads. We dissect everything we read, everything we watch, everything we hear. We try to fashion it and shape it and invert it into something usable. Into something we can write about. We pass a man yammering to himself on the sidewalk and, within minutes, we’ve concocted an entire backstory and plot. We know how we’d write this man.

Or we don’t. And that kills us.

We sulk away and claim writers block. We doubt we ever had THAT THING. That spark, that gift, that mojo.

We doubt. We doubt. We doubt.

We’re afraid to fail. So we stop writing. But that only angers the beast inside us and we’re reminded that just because we may not write in practice, we cannot simply walk away from the lens we view this world through. Whether you sit and write or not, your brain will not let you be. And so you have a choice: to write through the doubt or to let it gnaw on your gut as you wait for another passing moment of enthusiasm.

Should you take breaks? Yes, absolutely. Weeks? Sometimes. Months? Maybe. But should you ever let doubt be the reason you walk away? I think, no. Doubt is a monster we should never, ever feed.

I don’t know that there is one answer to the problem of self-doubt. But I think there are things that can help.

1. Redefine success. This word doesn’t have to mean what you’ve always assumed it meant. Redefine it. What is success to you? To me success is mattering, making a difference to someone. That’s success. I’m a Christian so I want to honor Christ. Success. I want to be of value to my publisher. That’s real, that’s success. Your definition of success might not match mine, but you should take a moment to figure out what it is. And be willing to adjust your definition as you grow.

2. Write through the doubt. It’s hard to swallow sometimes, but the only way to chase away the I CAN’Ts is to prove that YOU CAN. So prove it to yourself.

3. Write fearlessly. Being afraid to fail is very real, but if you let it hold you back, fear wins. Want some truth? We’re all afraid. Doing it anyway is what makes us fearless.

4. Look for inspiration. Those of us who write as a career have to learn something early on. Inspiration will not pay the bills. That said, perhaps you’re missing daily inspiration by assuming it will look as it always has. Try this, go outside. Be with people. Scrounge through bookstores and libraries. Go on grown-up field trips. Investigate the world around you. Inspiration may sporadically attack us, but if we go out looking it’ll have to try awfully hard to hide.

And finally,

5. Inspire someone else. Be the wind in someone else’s sails for a while. Put your pride, your competitive nature, your angst, fear, and doubt aside and lift someone up. Give them a sunshine moment. Not because you’re fishing for inspiration from their lips, but because we all need a little encouragement from time to time. And because others need to know just how valuable their contributions to the world are. Tell them.

These are just a few of the things that help me when I’m lost in the darkness of my own mind. What have I missed? What advice would you give? Today, let’s choose action in the face of paralyzing doubt.

YOU CAN do this. You absolutely can.

*And for the record, that picture up there–me with the sign–was taken for a project the lovely Myra McEntire put together. She also has some inspiring words to share on the monsters of doubt and depression. Read them. Be encouraged.

*Puts on a kilt* *Paints face blue* *Gets brave*

*Clears throat*

*Yells*

I have ARCs of DARK HALO!

For the newbies, Dark Halo is the final book in the Angel Eyes trilogy and is set to hit shelves in August. I cannot wait to share it with you all, but I’ll be honest. The idea of sending the conclusion out into the world is slightly terrifying.

It’s the end, you know? THE END.

*Breathes*

SO! In a Marty McFly effort to prove I’m not chicken (AND I’M NOT!), I’d like to give away my very first advance reader copy. The one right there on top. I’m using the uber easy Rafflecopter for this one, and there are lots of ways to enter. If you’re on Twitter, you can even come back daily to throw another entry into the hat.

I’ll pick a winner on Monday, May 20th. Spread the word, okay? Help a chicken out.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

If you’re here, you know me. At least well enough to know I’m the author of the Angel Eyes trilogy.  Two of the novels have been released and the third, Dark Halo, will be on shelves in August. It’s been a journey I will never, ever forget and throughout it all, there is one question I’m asked time and again.

Why write about angels and demons?

It’s a legitimate question, especially since the Christian marketplace is known more for their romantic novels than anything else. But I have to admit, at first I was a little taken aback by the question. You see, angels and demons have always played on the backdrop of my storytelling experience and it was the most natural thing in the world for me to speculate about.

I grew up in a church where the creative arts were encouraged. As a teenager, I was part of a traveling team that performed mime, puppetry, dance,  dramas and the like. We were called (and I almost hate to tell you this) DMV, the Dynamic Mighty Voices, which I’ve always thought was curious since the one thing we DIDN’T do was sing.

We started out doing puppets and such for the Sunday school classes at church and that led us to our first competition where we took home little gold medals in both puppetry and mime. After that, our fearless leader, Sherry, led us through every open door that followed. We performed at malls, a Billy Graham crusade, with Psalty. All things, you church brats will appreciate. But mostly, we toured other churches, youth groups, and schools. It was a time that shaped so much of who I am today. And it absolutely fueled my passion for storytelling.

About a month ago, I did a Twitter chat with Inspire Writers and I promised to post a few pictures of myself during these years. See, when church kids tell stories, there is always a built in bad guy. Satan, right? And somehow, some way, I ended up playing him an awful lot. I couldn’t find as many pictures as I would have liked, but here are a few.

And yes, I give you permission to laugh. 

This is the oh-so-official publicity shot for DMV.  I’m in the bottom row, far left, and that is my favorite puppet, Penelope. Please note the birds up there in the top row. They’re sitting on the shoulders of Sherry Patterson. She is to blame for much of what I am today.

This shot was taken a bit earlier. I was in junior high here and this is a school production, The Tempest. Not sure why I’m wearing different colored tights, but here I am as Sycorax.

This was taken at summer camp. I’m there on the far right. We were the mean girls before mean girls were cool.

Performing at the mall here, a mime called Sleepwalking. I’m the second from the right. So many hilarious make-up faux pas when we were in our face paint.

Here we are performing Carman’s, The Champion, on the beaches of Tijuana. Now, the truth is, youth groups the world over have done this drama. Certainly not original, but I got to play Satan. Tons of fun, by the way.

Of course, I’ve played Mary the mother of Jesus. I mean, who hasn’t? I can’t quite remember when this was taken. After high school some time.

This was a show I did while in college called Eternity. It’s very similar to Heaven’s Gates and Hell’s Flames. See all those angels behind me?

And you wondered why I chose to examine the invisible.

I’ve just finished going through the typeset pages for Dark Halo.

I have to tell you, there is something so satisfying about ending a story just where you wanted to end it, and I’m grateful Thomas Nelson gave me the opportunity to share Brielle’s journey with you all. Not too much longer, you guys. August 20th!

BUT, before I send these pages off, I thought I’d share a little teaser. That sound fun?

And since we’re here, all of us, hanging out, we might as well do a giveaway, right?

How about a signed copy of Broken Wings and a snazzy Broken Wings poster? Let’s keep it simple this time. Leave a comment on this post and I’ll choose one lucky winner on Monday, 4/8.

And now for the teaser….

Both Angel Eyes and Broken Wings have three narrators and Dark Halo is the same. Want to see whose eyes you’ll be looking through as the trilogy comes to a close?

Whatcha think? Leave a comment for a chance to win!

I really am excited about this one. We pick up Brielle’s journey about 7 months after Angel Eyes ends. There are new angels, a demonic army, swords and scimitars and secrets. (Oh my!) The Prince of Darkness gets a little stage time as well.

It was a fun story to write and I’d love to celebrate its launch with you. I’ll be doing a few giveaways at the event–books and swag–and I’ll have bookmarks for everyone. Here are the details.

Broken Wings Launch and Book Signing

Saturday, February 23rd | 1pm – 3pm

Barnes & Noble, Birdcage

6111 Sunrise Blvd, Citrus Heights, CA

And since I know you can’t all come to the launch, I’m running a giveaway here as well. One lucky winner will receive a prize pack including signed copies of Angel Eyes and Broken Wings, an Angel Eyes poster, a Broken Wings poster, and bookmarks. Use the Rafflecopter below to enter and I’ll announce the winner the morning of the launch. Thank you all for celebrating with me!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

I am a huge 49er fan. Always have been. When I was a kid, the team practiced just up the road and my dad would take the three of us girls out to watch. I even have a war story (and maybe a scar or two) from the time I got Jerry Rice’s autograph.

Needless to say, this climb back to glory the Niners have undertaken is quite exciting for me. There have been so many moving pieces and parts to track as the franchise fights their way back from nearly a decade of struggles. One of the more recent, and more colorful pieces to watch dance has been head coach, Jim Harbaugh. From his hard hitting handshakes to his vein popping tantrums on the sidelines, he is quite a character. And I like characters.

When he came to San Francisco, he brought with him a saying from his childhood that has really become the anthem of the team and, in turn, Niner Nation. It goes a little something like this:

The story of how that saying came to be is here, but the real genius of it is found in how Harbaugh’s used it to build a culture around his players. Early in the season (obviously) I caught an interview Bob Costas did with Vernon Davis and Alex Smith. Bob Costas asks Alex (and I’m paraphrasing here) how, through all the years, through all the criticism, was he able to maintain belief in himself. This is what Alex says:

For me, I think, I looked around at the league, especially at the quarterback position, and you soon realize that nobody has it easy. No one had the easy way to become a starting quarterback and playing well. Everybody’s gone through things, everybody deals with things. It’s the good ones–the guys who stick around are the guys who focus on what they can control . . . The people that allow the other stuff, the negativity to creep into their head, allow it to affect them, you aren’t going to be around very long. You’ve got to be thick skinned. You can’t let those things change your work ethic, change your approach to the game.

Wise, right? And because I think sports are a great metaphor for living, that statement has stayed with me. I assume it’s stayed with Alex as well. I hope it has. It’s all part of that culture, isn’t it? It’s a mindset that says, “NOBODY has it better than me. Everyone I am tempted to compare myself to has stuff to fight. They have things they must battle through, mountains to conquer. No one has it easy.”

I don’t know, maybe I’m just overly excited about tonight’s game. And nervous. I’m nervous. Because we’re playing the Packers. And since every game moving forward is possibly our last I thought I’d take this opportunity to share this lesson I learned from Coach Harbaugh, Alex Smith, and the Niner Nation.

Who’s got it better than us?

NOBODY!

It’s a YA Christmas everybody! And for 12 days, I’ll be giving away a few of my favorite things.

BOOKS!

Use the Rafflecopter below to enter. You can continue to enter throughout the contest, so pop by and get your name in often. I’ll announce one winner each day starting next Monday, December 3rd and running through Friday, December 14th.

The daily prizes are listed below. Each winner will receive an electronic copy of Broken Wings. It’s an e-galley, an early copy, which means you’re special because Broken Wings won’t be hitting shelves until February. Pretty cool, huh!? One grand prize winner will be announced on the 14th and will receive a copy of all six books.

A huge thanks to my publisher, Thomas Nelson, for helping me put this giveaway together. They really are amazing. MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

12/3: Broken Wings & Angel Eyes both by me! WINNER: Elisa Calhoun

12/4: Broken Wings & If We Survive by Andrew Klavan WINNER: Alissa Fendrick

12/5: Broken Wings & Swipe by Evan Angler WINNER: Chrissy Wolfe

12/6: Broken Wings & Right Where I Belong by Krista McGee WINNER: Alyssa Washburn

12/7: Broken Wings & Spirit Fighter by Jerel Law WINNER: Donna Stinson

12/8: Broken Wings & Angel Eyes both by me! WINNER: Cordelia Fitzgerald

12/9: Broken Wings & If We Survive by Andrew Klavan WINNER: Carissa Sikes

12/10: Broken Wings & Swipe by Evan Angler WINNER: Britney Wyatt

12/11: Broken Wings & Right Where I Belong by Krista McGee WINNER: Dani Mione

12/12: Broken Wings & Spirit Fighter by Jerel Law WINNER: Cynthia McCord

Fun little update: Jerel Law is also offering a signed copy of his newest book, Fire Prophet, with the 12/12 giveaway!

12/13: Broken Wings & Angel Eyes both by me! WINNER: Bethany Baldwin

12/14: GRAND PRIZE! One copy of each book listed above. WINNER: Alicia Argenti

Note: Broken Wings will be an electronic book that is emailed to you. All the other books in this giveaway are trade paperback.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

I wasn’t always so paranoid about disagreements. Confrontation didn’t bother me. Conflict was a natural thing, and should be dealt with just as naturally. But after a handful of sour experiences several years ago, I just don’t have the stomach for it.

And now, I find myself doing anything and everything to avoid that kind of situation. At first, my efforts weren’t big ones. More reactionary. I’d avoid certain people, certain situations. I’d skirt issues that were sure to frustrate me. I patently refused to talk about politics or other uncomfortable topics. And while all of these things are probably okay–and sometimes wise–when done in moderation, it wasn’t long before I noticed something. My efforts were–and sometimes still are–keeping me from participating in the things I love. Not only do I actively avoid frustration, I have a tendency to run from it.

Because I’m afraid.

Afraid of losing friends. Of losing my mind. Of  the battle that ravages my gut when people are disappointed in me.

I run from conflict because something tells me that’s easier. Until, in my messy efforts to avoid one frustration, I run smack into another. Because, guess what, people are everywhere. Life happens. And perhaps the hardest thing for any of us to swallow: not everyone agrees with me. *shock*

But this whole running thing is ugliest when the inevitable downside rears it’s ugly head. When I am forced to deal with conflict, I find I’m out of practice. I’m rusty. And my efforts to resolve even the smallest of frustrations are awkward and leave me angsty when all is said and done.

But I’m onto it now. It’s taken me a while, but I’ve finally realized that avoiding conflict is impossible. So I’m navigating the strange choppy waters of my own self-esteem and reminding myself that even complete anonymity won’t keep some people from disliking me. Haters will find me. They’ll find you. But if we hide from the possibility of frustration, we might just keep out the people who actually like us. Who care about us. Who are close enough to actually hurt us from time to time.

I’m a work in progress, people, and I’m learning. The Bible says all sorts of things about dealing with conflict. Most notable is the passage in Matthew 18.

But if I’m honest, the thing that helps me most when I’m adrift on waves of emotion, is to remember that God’s love for us surpasses all these things. He’s knows our brokenness. And even when we’re hiding, when we’re frustrated and lost, when we’re terrified of dealing with the inevitable conflict around us, nothing, nothing, nothing can separate us from God’s love.

Cling to that when it’s hard. When you don’t have the strength to face another conflict, remember God’s words in 2 Corinthians 12:9: My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.

I’m learning that my own strength is never enough. There’s truth to the insecure little voice that spouts, “You can’t do this alone!” But there’s peace in the idea as well. Because I’ve never been asked to face the frustrations of this life alone. And I think I can do just about anything when I’m wrapped in God’s love.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? … No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.–Romans 8:35, 37-39 

Yes, us!

The ever inspiring Jenny Lundquist and I will be linking arms with the cutest bookstore ever: Face in a Book.

We’ll be chatting a bit about books and publishing. We’ll be taking questions of course, and I’ve got an inkling there will be candy.

This will be a great event for the whole family and I promise, once you see this adorable bookstore, you’ll thank us for introducing you. And now for the details:

Saturday, November 3

1pm – 3pm

Face In A Book

4359 Town Center Blvd, Suite 113, El Dorado Hills, CA

Books will be available for purchase.

Click for more details & to RSVP

You can read more about my debut novel, Angel Eyes, here.

And for more info about Jenny and Seeing Cinderella, be sure to visit her site.